I’m about to make a trip to the DMV to register my car again. If you could only see my excitement. I don’t think anyone has fabulous tales of the cheery government agency. Mostly just ulcers and scabs.

For years I’ve had personalized plates, but those were all out of California. I think I never pursued them in the Golden State because their lack of the DMV’s sense of humor. They just no likey likey to laugh at private number plates.

Years ago I traveled to the DMV with my friend Jeff as he attempted to get KICKN TA for his Trans Am. They didn’t see the fun in that plate and it was denied. From there I witness a parade of denied plates my friends all attempted. There never was a clear explanation, just how it was deemed bad.

My last personalized plated was FARK TV. It was in Atlanta and the lady behind the counter just said “ha, that sounds like Fart!” Then she asked me what sort of plate I’d like.

It makes me wish I really asked for Fart. Although that may have cut into my personal life.

I’m not sure if I will attempted them this year… but if I do I really need to do what these guys did. And by that I mean roll the dice and hope you get someone who is just plain clueless.

Oh to have one of these plates. There have to be my top 10 favorite personalized plates from across the states.

10. WTF OMFG

9. Eat The Kids First


8. PLS STFU

7. VAGINA

6. ASS ORGY


5. LUV BJS


4. KILL AOL


3. MUWAHAHA


2. I PWN YOU


1. GOATSE