The Holidays are always an interesting time for me. In most part because I don’t really participate. When people ask what I’d like for Xmas or my birthday which immediately follows I just reply “thanks but please don’t get me anything.”

In all honesty I mean it. If there is anything I ever want I usually just buy it myself. The best part about doing that is I don’t have to get something for somebody else in return. The only reason I probably didn’t buy myself something is because I’m broke or I hate shopping. If someone buys me something, now I have to get them something back. At this point the “I’m broke” or the “I hate shopping” stance just doesn’t hold water. I’m committed.

Now… at this point do I hand off one of the many weird and unusable gifts I’ve been given over the years? I’m not the most conventional person to hit the planet therefore people always feel the need to give me the strangest gifts. As much as I enjoy the wacky, I don’t always know what to do with a origami making machine or a boxer dispenser. So they sit on my closet for years until I have an ebay twitch or someone is playing in my office and say “what is this?”. My reply is usually “it’s yours!”

Why do we even feel the need to give gifts? No one enjoys the awkwardness of opening a gift in front of other people. No one ever really knows anyone else’s sizes. No one seems to consider how Christmas time manages to put millions into debt counseling.

But then again… if it wasn’t for bad gifting would we still have garage sales?

Well, now that I’m done ranting. I’d like to remind everyone my birthday is February 2nd and I am an XL and look great in blues.